Perhaps I feel most contemplative on Fridays. Or most awake. Or most thankful for my kiddos because I know I will go without their presence for several days. Whatever it is, it seems that Friday is the day I'm most likely to blog. Hopefully someday I will feel prompted to blog on Wednesdays or even (gasp) Mondays. Either way, here are some thoughts...
This week we had parent-teacher conferences. Two LONG days back-to-back with a day of teaching the kiddos sandwiched between the conferences. However, when I arrived home late last night, all I wanted to do was spill everything to Daniel. He has learned that sometimes I want to talk when I get home from school, but most of the time, I just want to zone out. So he offered to help me zone out by suggesting one of our favorite shows. However, my response was, "I just want to tell you a bunch of stories." So I did. And my wonderful husband just listened. Oh I love him. I won't be spilling as many details as I did last night, but some of my conversations with parents were so interesting that I just need to share.
1: After a long conference with a pair of parents about a student's performance in my class as well as his behavior outside of school and some other things going on in his life, his dad looked at me in desperation and said, "Okay, we really have no idea what to do here. We are just at a loss. Please, tell us what we need to do. He is not like our other kids, and it seems as if nothing is working. Anything you suggest, we'll do. Please help us." Flabbergasted (and slightly at a loss for words), I stumbled around for a bit. I knew this was a HUGE opportunity, and I didn't want to suggest something ludicrous. I won't divulge what I suggested because that's not the punch line of this story. The punch line is that two desperate parents sat in front of me pleading for me to give them the answer to their son's (not abnormal) problems. Today my heart is heavy for that family, and I certainly hope that what I said gave them hope. Whenever parents tell me about issues their child is having, I always say that their child is not experiencing something unusual. I hope that makes them feel comfortable and as if they are not alone. Either way, my goodness, I learned a thing or two about parenting in that situation. At one point, I even said, "I'm not a parent, so I'm not entirely sure what to suggest, but if I was..." What an opportunity to offer parenting advice as a young, non-parent to veteran parents. So sweet and special.
2: I came close to crying during this conference. Again, after a long conference with a mother about a student's performance in my class and his behavior outside of school, I felt as if I needed to confide in the mother about some behaviors I had noticed in my classroom. We began to put some pieces together, and the mother was in tears. She was so broken up about her child and the decisions he was making. Again, I heard, "We have no idea what to do. He doesn't listen to us. We just hope we can make it through." I, of course, reminded her that her child is not out of the norm for the decisions that are being made, and maybe that helped a little, but we were talking about HER little baby, so no matter what I said, her heart was tearing in two. Finally, in tears, she said, "Can I ask you a favor? Would you talk to him? I think he would listen to you." Wow. I told her that I would, so now I anxiously await a time on Tuesday when I can sit down with the kiddo and have a conversation. So powerful.
3: On a lighter note...in a sweet conversation with a couple who does not speak much English, the man attempted to make small talk at the end of the conference and asked me a few personal questions. They went like this..."In Topeka, hot or cold, where you were." "Oh it's about the same temperature as where I'm from." "I see. Big or small?" "It's definitely a bigger city than what I'm used to." For a night of heavy conversations, it was a sweet, humorous moment. He thanked me for my time as he left, and shook my hand for about 10 seconds (we all know that is a LONG handshake).
After I finished telling Daniel all these stories (and more), he said, "How about we never have teenagers. We can be a foster home for any kid before they turn 13." Honestly, the more I work with teenagers, the more that seems appealing. I don't know how many times I've heard in the last two days, "We try to keep them from the harmful things, but it seems we can't shelter them from everything." True story. And each time, I would offer (oh goodness, I hope this is good), "You know, if they are going to make mistakes, they might as well make them in high school when they have mom and dad at home to take care of them." Yikes. So here's to hoping that this teaching experience teaches me to be a perfect parent. Ha. Realistically, I just hope that the lessons I learn stick with me until our future children are teenagers. Don't worry though, we've got at least 20 years before that happens. :)
It's a beautiful day outside, and it's calling my name. Until next Friday, or perhaps sooner...
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